feat: Added post about new years resolutions

src/content/post/new-years-resolutions-shape-identity.md

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+---
+title: "Shaping identity instead of counting actions"
+description: "Why New-Year resolutions are awesome and why I don't want to do 30 push ups this year"
+publishDate: "2025-01-06"
+updatedDate: "2025-01-06"
+tags: ["personal", "goals"]
+---
+
+Years end is a very nice time.
+It allows us to connect with family, with ourselves, with all the fatty but delicious foods.
+And also with ourselves.
+As I tend to be pretty egoistic, I love this last part the most.
+For around five years now, I use the end of the year to reflect on my progress and plan ahead what's up next for myself.
+So far that's pretty much what most people do.
+It's also the reason most of us are hitting the gym in January, trying out mindfulness techniques and pretending that this is now really the point where the best version of ourselves is formed.
+
+While this may sound a little sarcastic it is my honest feeling. But you know what? It's a good thing!
+
+I like the following saying a lot:
+> The best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. The second best time is now.
+
+Let me extend it a bit by appending the following:
+> The third best time is on New Year's Eve.
+
+Apart from the obvious clue that planting trees doesn't work particularly well in December/January (at least in my european latitude), there are some obvious benefits on starting new goals/plans/habits in this timeframe:
+1. The amount of resources for beginners is quite high, since there is a lot of demand by the sheer amount of people starting over their new goals.
+This includes discounts for gyms and self-improvement material (apps and courses) but also communities being more open to newcomers.
+2. You likely have some more free time in the days after Christmas.
+This helps with planning but also takes away some of the usual distractions that keep our attention locked (most important school and work but also meet ups and obligations).
+At least my brain craves some intellectual tasks after doomscrolling, talking about the weather with relatives and watching Paw Patrol for couple days straight with my kids.
+3. The whole symbolic model of "Starting a new year in your life" or "Closing the old chapter and opening a new one" is quite powerful.
+It might give some extra motivation to finally change something.
+Especially after you are filled to the top with love by all the feel good romances you had to watch with your wife (oddly specific, I know 😉).
+
+So how do I do the whole thing?
+And what is different this year?
+
+I have five different areas in my life I want to improve in:
+- Hobby (mostly sports and living healthy but also gaming )
+- Character (changing my attitude towards myself and others, working on bad habits)
+- Marriage/Family (improving the life with my wife, being a better dad)
+- Friendships (keeping in contact with others, doing regular and irregular meet ups to keep connected)
+- Work (advancing my career, improving my coding)
+
+What I used to do is writing down two to three [SMART](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/SMART_criteria) goals.
+This would be something like "Being able to do 30 push ups at the end of the year" or "Do a hiking trip over 50km together with Paul".
+While this kinda worked (I had around 70% success rate) this method had some major downsides:
+- They sometimes became irrelevant pretty fast.
+Imagine Paul having a crisis in his marriage or reschedules his holiday --> No hiking together, goal failed.
+- They reward results not progress.
+For example getting sick and having to stop the training for a couple times a year --> Only 20 push ups, goal failed.
+- They are just two many options to focus on.
+Having 10+ SMART goals in parallel are not going to work out.
+If somehow they do, they were not SMART (especially "Achievable") enough.
+
+But at least they gave me some succes, so I continued doing them.
+In fact I already fully planned out 10 specific goals for 2025 already.
+Then I came around [this video](https://youtu.be/BiZ1CLT3nEM?si=ZDZE9WZwmmMkeBDI) of ThePrimeagen talking about change.
+He showed his approach which can be summarized in the following points:
+1. Focus on identity instead of actions --> "I become a disciplined engineer"
+2. Each month pick one desired identity and NOW pick the action --> "I will do a leet code exercise each working day"
+3. At the end of the month reiterate what went good, what went bad.
+Write it down.
+
+You will try out more things and be more robust to changes.
+And if you REALLY enjoyed doing one month of leet code, just continue doing it.
+It's most likely a habbit already.
+And habits are the endgame anyway and win you the game in the long run.
+
+Remember, it's estimated that 80% of new years resolutions fail.
+That means if you just start just three things this year you already have a 87% (`1 - 0.8^12`) chance of at least one of them sticking.
+Meaning that you will form at least one new habit this year.
+
+Have a good day stranger and now go ahead and start over!
+I wish you the best.
+
+Thanks for reading 🐸