BACKPORT [IMP] orm: exists for one2many searches

[moylop260]

Use the EXISTS clause of SQL instead of IN for one2many fields.

```
WHERE tab."id" IN (SELECT "inverse" FROM cotab WHERE ...)
-- becomes
WHERE EXISTS(SELECT FROM (
SELECT "inverse" AS __inverse FROM cotab WHERE ...
) WHERE __inverse = tab."id")
```

The subselect is here to avoid alias name clashes between the main query
and the subquery. It is trivial and predicates will be pushed down.
Usually postgres can plan better queries for such queries than for IN
queries where it often chooses to materialize the subquery before
performing the IN operation, especially for NOT EXISTS queries.

Backport from odoo@988d59d

Related to issue odoo#211586