backlog

benthecoder · benthecoder · commit 49ba810f0fc0 · 2025-08-03T01:39:10.000-05:00
diff --git a/app/library/library.md b/app/library/library.md
@@ -102,3 +102,7 @@ tech
 - [Haruki Murakami, The Art of Fiction No. 182](https://www.theparisreview.org/interviews/2/the-art-of-fiction-no-182-haruki-murakami)
 - [David Mitchell, The Art of Fiction No. 204](https://web.archive.org/web/20120107072852/https://www.theparisreview.org/interviews/6034/the-art-of-fiction-no-204-david-mitchell)
 - [Ursula K. Le Guin, The Art of Fiction No. 221](https://web.archive.org/web/20150106213733/https://www.theparisreview.org/interviews/6253/the-art-of-fiction-no-221-ursula-k-le-guin)
+
+## Bookmarks
+
+- [The Best Tacit Knowledge Videos on Every Subject — LessWrong](https://www.lesswrong.com/posts/SXJGSPeQWbACveJhs/the-best-tacit-knowledge-videos-on-every-subject)
diff --git a/posts/010625.md b/posts/010625.md
@@ -0,0 +1,18 @@
+---
+title: 'lunch with the parents'
+tags: 'journal'
+date: 'Jun 1, 2025'
+---
+
+i woke up eaerly again, around 6am. i spent an hour, even buying a new pen from 7 eleven to write the card for her parents. i practiced a few times to avoid silly mistakes. i ironed my perry ellis linen shirt for an hour. on the wall and on the table. i wanted to present myself in the best way possible.
+
+i arrived at 10:25 for the 10:30 church service. i went to a nearby family mart to get food. when they arrived i saw her and her mom. i greeted her mom but she never greeted back, maybe i was too soft. their church is incredibly lively, almost like a cult. maybe this is what churches are supposed to be. members that are full of vigor to worship and responsive and attentive to the pastors. the sermon was a good reminder on what it means to not seek worth from achievements.
+
+the lunch was at one of their regular spots. the restaurant was as loud as the night before the first day of chinese new year. i could barely speak that day, and in this restaurant, i might as well be mute. the dad was nice to me, but the mom was never nice to begin with. i felt like a stranger, and she was hostile. she shot at me a lot of questions that were criticisms on my behaviour and just on who i am as a person, like my background, my parents, my health issues, my future path, and also warnings on how we SHOULD behave in a relationship. after the lunch i felt like i was not worthy of her.
+
+i went to a few places alone to take pictures. i wanted to make use of my time here. without my camera traveling would be so boring.
+
+1. chiang kai-shek memorial hall (like the DC Abraham Lincoln but for taipei)
+2. dr sun yat-sen park
+
+the rest of the day i rested at the hotel. my dinner was from 7 eleven again.
diff --git a/posts/020625.md b/posts/020625.md
@@ -0,0 +1,23 @@
+---
+title: 'songshan cultural park'
+tags: 'journal'
+date: 'Jun 2, 2025'
+---
+
+i met up with her at the train station again. i felt better again, but both of us were clearly impacted by her mother.
+
+we walked under the sun under an umbrella and went to the eslite bookstore.
+
+we had udon noodles here, and i got to sit beside her, chatting with her. with her, doing normal and boring things like eating udon and watching people order udon was nice, i didn't need to achieve anything big or great, with her, i just had to be me. i don't feel like this often. and i wish it could be like this forever.
+
+we bought a Fujicolor Simple Ace Disposable Camera for 990 NTD and proceeded on an adventure to take turns taking pictures. we had 27 shots.
+
+we went to a cat cafe got 5 drinks to satisfy 280 NTD per person. the cats weren't very playful, but i felt happy seeing her play with one of them at the end.
+
+we went to a few thrift stores and took more pictures together. i didn't buy anything, and we barely spent more than 10 minutes in each of them.
+
+we ended the night with hotpot. we got a terrible seat, where the floor was sinking, and we were under a time crunch to get her home by 9:30. but it was nice eating with her.
+
+even though i could barely talk the entire day, and my throat kept itching upon a single word, i still had one of the best days of my life.
+
+i can't imagine being able to do this everyday with her. maybe we'll both get used to it, and we might even start taking each other for granted, or worse, get sick of each other. true love only grows stronger when it is challenged and tested, and this is our test.
diff --git a/posts/030625.md b/posts/030625.md
@@ -0,0 +1,9 @@
+---
+title: 'tpe -> kul'
+tags: 'journal'
+date: 'Jun 3, 2025'
+---
+
+i dragged two luggages all the way to the museum where we last stood under the rain past midnight. this time it rained too. we took our final few shots on the camera. we took the train together to tauyuan airport. we exchanged cards, the prompt was to write about memorable and special moments from the past few days. i had a lot to write about and i meant every word. i felt sad leaving, but i know i'll see her very soon again.
+
+i got home and around 10pm and ate chicken porridge that my sister cooked for me. my throat was still ruined, but i felt safe being home. my parents were returning the next day.
diff --git a/posts/040625.md b/posts/040625.md
@@ -0,0 +1,7 @@
+---
+title: 'home alone'
+tags: 'journal'
+date: 'Jun 4, 2025'
+---
+
+i had the house to myself. i went to desa setapak to see the clinic, and also went to family mart. i miss the 7eleven in taipei. i stayed home entire day. called T through out the day too. we're in separate parts of the world agian, but still in the same timezone. i played the piano. parents got back later in the evening.
diff --git a/posts/050625.md b/posts/050625.md
@@ -0,0 +1,7 @@
+---
+title: 'comfort of home'
+tags: 'journal'
+date: 'Jun 5, 2025'
+---
+
+i ate johnny's green noodles with bbq chicken. and also discovered that there's a species of ants that bite through wood, and leaves these flaky bits that looks like eggs. but is just chaved wood stuck together with ant saliva. gross but is very interesting. nothing much happened today. just a peaceful day at home with my mom and sis.
diff --git a/posts/060625.md b/posts/060625.md
@@ -0,0 +1,17 @@
+---
+title: 'cs lewis collection'
+tags: 'journal'
+date: 'Jun 6, 2025'
+---
+
+The definition of faith:
+
+> An act of the will, accompanied by emotion, that leads to action on behalf of its object.
+>
+> – Voddie Baucham
+
+i need to get my hands on the entire cs lewis collection. and i have to finish all of them. and more so, i should put into practice the teachings in his books.
+
+A DS question i found: [Should you ask data science job candidates this tricky math question? – r y x, r](https://ryxcommar.com/2023/06/26/should-you-ask-data-science-job-candidates-this-tricky-math-question/)
+
+started to develop the papertrail app david wants with tauri, but i kept facing bugs. rust is difficult.
diff --git a/posts/070625.md b/posts/070625.md
@@ -0,0 +1,13 @@
+---
+title: 'mission impossible, the finale'
+tags: 'journal'
+date: 'Jun 7, 2025'
+---
+
+watched mission impossible with my mom at midvalley. tom cruise is so good at action movies. one day i want to binge watch the whole thing again.
+
+got two polo shirts from uniqlo. got an "expensive" belt from isetan. first real belt i've ever gotten for the aapm conference.
+
+o3 deep research is so useful. i use it for everything
+
+an insider into how nathan lambert writes: https://www.interconnects.ai/p/how-i-write
diff --git a/posts/080625.md b/posts/080625.md
@@ -0,0 +1,13 @@
+---
+title: 'playing the keys'
+tags: 'journal'
+date: 'Jun 8, 2025'
+---
+
+i played for mont kiara church today. and talked to a few church members. i played the amen song terribly. my memory did not serve me well.
+
+kept thinking about building the still app, a prayer reminder [app](https://chatgpt.com/share/684598a1-c1c0-8000-8938-ab3ac5b37f3d).
+
+got home and grinded out on arabesque on the piano the rest of the day and worked out on the stationary bicycle.
+
+watched drug development with AI [video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XpIMuCeEtSk&t=1303s) from (https://blog.google/technology/ai/google-deepmind-isomorphic-alphafold-3-ai-model/ while working out. protein structures are like 3d jigsaw puzzles, so making drugs are like making the right lego pieces that fit for molecules. but it was surprising to hear that there is a 90% failure rate for drug development, only 1 in 20 medicinal chemist have their drugs work in clinical trials.
diff --git a/posts/090625.md b/posts/090625.md
@@ -0,0 +1,7 @@
+---
+title: 'passport renewal'
+tags: 'journal'
+date: 'Jun 9, 2025'
+---
+
+i went to Sentul to renew my passport with my mom. we went to klcc after that, and i bought my ecco shoes. they cost RM700. prices are so large in malaysia that it's hard to swallow when buying things, but after converting it, and realizing it's $160 dollars, it made it easier. went to kinokuniya to browse the current releases. i remember how i sat down to finish the stranger by camus here. it made me want to learn french so i can read the book in french. after getting home, i was on youtube. i watched a [short](https://youtube.com/shorts/2sAxZdyUBI8?si=BmhWmPn3EWBFhtn0) about homemade tofu. turns out you only need this ingredient: Glucono-δ-lactone, a.k.a GDL.
diff --git a/posts/100625.md b/posts/100625.md
@@ -0,0 +1,13 @@
+---
+title: 'barium swallow'
+tags: 'journal'
+date: 'Jun 10, 2025'
+---
+
+today was my doctors appointment. the actual reason why i came back. left at 9am, S drove my mom and i. i was schedueld for 10:30a.m. but i had to wait for 2 hours. the doctor responsible for my test was not aware of the purpose of my test, or my background or medical history. that was odd to experience. i had to explain what i was there for. malaysia needs to be better at this. i went to one of the best (most expensive) hospital in KL.
+
+i saw my surgeon at 2pm. he tells me everything is fine and i don't have to worry about the wrap and i have decades. i felt skeptical. wouldn't the person who treated you want to say that for their own benefit? i asked about gym and they said i am one of the rare people who feel my surgery and thus can feel discomfort while doing workouts, but also said i can do whatever and it wouldn't affect the wrap. i brought up antidepressants and he was very willing to prescribe me some. i don't know how i feel about his assurance. i need to see a new doctor.
+
+we went to my town shopping mall. we watched karate kid legends. i liked this movie, it portrays how it feels to move into a new place and having to adapt and find your place, and also touches on trauma and having your past creep up into the present, and having friends and family help you navigate and get through it.
+
+we had dimsum for dinner. i learned that i love the fried taro balls.
diff --git a/posts/110625.md b/posts/110625.md
@@ -0,0 +1,13 @@
+---
+title: 'midvalley'
+tags: 'journal'
+date: 'Jun 11, 2025'
+---
+
+we went midvalley with my sister. i watched the thunderbolts movie with my mom. this one was an a marvels version of suicide squad. it was big on mental health, where they talk about the emptiness was quite overused, and when they started turning people into black shadows and everything was being engulfed, it looked a bit silly but it could have been worse. it was inception like when they travelled through different rooms and memories.
+
+bought a new frying pan and pot and knife from isetan. auntie B gave us her experience and recomendations.
+
+we also got an antler luggage that cost RM 900.
+
+im blessed with a family and with essentials that will help me thrive and survive in the US. i have nothing to complain about.
diff --git a/posts/120625.md b/posts/120625.md
@@ -0,0 +1,7 @@
+---
+title: 'herbaline'
+tags: 'journal'
+date: 'Jun 12, 2025'
+---
+
+started playing assasins creed the rebel collection on my sister's switch. i bought this game ages ago but didn't get into playin git. went to do a facial at herbaline. it is always more painful that what i remember. i really like how it starts with a salt bath for your feet, and ends with the fishes that chew on your dead skin. the massages are also incredible.
diff --git a/posts/130625.md b/posts/130625.md
@@ -0,0 +1,11 @@
+---
+title: 'klcc'
+tags: 'journal'
+date: 'Jun 13, 2025'
+---
+
+started the day with breakfast at the indian restaurant (mamak) below my apartment. they changed owners, and everything is shiny and the lights are blinding. over the years it changed a few times. just like us growing older, into different versions of our past selves, the things around us, the shops, the buildings, all grow as well.
+
+went to watch "how to train your dragon" with my mom. a few notable moments, the father son dynamic, toothless and hiccup flying for the first time, the village accepting toothless, and the final scene where dragons are coexisting with vikings.
+
+shopped at isetan for some food to bring back to the US. saw a church auntie here, we took a picture together like i'm a celebrity.
diff --git a/posts/140525.md b/posts/140525.md
@@ -8,4 +8,4 @@ i drove a zipcar (toyota corolla) to SFO with A to pick up my parents. i haven't
 
 it's interesting to see my parents here again. grateful for them and their support for my education. i find it hard to appreciate how privileged i am for being able to live in sf and study here at a private school. did i fully make use of my time here? did i maximize agency? looking back, i was tired a lot, and my self-confidence took a hit from my interviews with FAANG. but i'm now constantly considering what i truly want. and it's hard to do so when my life is so intermixed with expectations and desires influenced by the people in my life
 
-i looked into [Open Evidence](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nPOZ1nA2RIw) more and it's insane how they $107M funding, $75M from Sequoia in their series A. i want to work for this company. their models score >90% on USMLE. i wonder if they would release an API. i'll write about them for contrary next.
+i looked into [Open Evidence](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nPOZ1nA2RIw) more and it's insane how they \$107M funding, \$75M from Sequoia in their series A. i want to work for this company. their models score >90% on USMLE. i wonder if they would release an API. i'll write about them for contrary next.
diff --git a/posts/140625.md b/posts/140625.md
@@ -0,0 +1,13 @@
+---
+title: 'port dickson'
+tags: 'journal'
+date: 'Jun 14, 2025'
+---
+
+today i went back to my parents' hometown to visit my popo. she's the only connection to my past left on both sides of my family.
+
+first we arrived at her house and my mom was my translator, as we asked her questions about what she remembers about our family history, what my great grandfather did, where they came from, how life was when the japanese were here. even my mom learned a few things. i have to thank T's mom for inspiring this.
+
+we had lunch together at a chinese restaurant with AC. i like 上汤啦啦 and 芋头扣肉. after lunch we went back to her home and continued to chat. but the house was warm and air was sticky and i fell asleep. wi also fell asleep on the drive home.
+
+we ended the day with kbbq for fathers day. and i played played assasins creed on the hp monitor.
diff --git a/posts/150625.md b/posts/150625.md
@@ -0,0 +1,7 @@
+---
+title: 'last sunday'
+tags: 'journal'
+date: 'Jun 15, 2025'
+---
+
+it was the last sunday before i fly back to the US. an auntie and uncle from my old church wanted to take a photo with me, and said they wanted to inspire their son to study for a PhD too. even though he's still in high school. i never felt like i'm someone that people can look up to. i feel like i haven't done anything to deserve that. i'm also just a privileged kid who had a dad that can pay for his education to the US, and got lucky a few times just by writing online and diving into rabbit holes. where i am is just the result of a list of sacrifices from my parents.
diff --git a/posts/160625.md b/posts/160625.md
@@ -0,0 +1,17 @@
+---
+title: 'back to sf'
+tags: 'journal'
+date: 'Jun 16, 2025'
+---
+
+got a ride to teh airport with my sister and mom, they came along for the ride. they helped me pack everything
+
+watched three movies on the plane
+
+- grand budapest hotel: visuals are A+, the story was not what i expected, it was fun and sad
+- the intern: old people have the most wisdom
+- dune: cinematography was A+, disliked the ending.
+
+the plane was so comfortable. flying united back was a grave mistake. i think i even slept 8 hours, the first time ever on a plane.
+
+i went through customs with no issues. all they wanted was my f1 and asked when i graduate. forgot how cold it is in SF.
diff --git a/posts/170625.md b/posts/170625.md
@@ -0,0 +1,7 @@
+---
+title: 'venture rewards'
+tags: 'journal'
+date: 'Jun 17, 2025'
+---
+
+i got the venture rewards card today. i will be spending a lot on the DC trip, so might as well since i get 75k bonus miles for spedning 4k in 3 months. went to have rice noodles with adrian. shared about my taiwan experience with him. then went to his house and completely passed out on one of his plushies. im gonna miss hanging out with him. adrian is a rare breed of human that would always be ready to listen and actually cares.
diff --git a/posts/180625.md b/posts/180625.md
@@ -0,0 +1,11 @@
+---
+title: 'napa day 1'
+tags: 'journal'
+date: 'Jun 18, 2025'
+---
+
+today is the first day of the napa trip. besides yosemite, this is the only other trip that i have with my classmates. we left around 1pm from J's house, and the first stop was domaine carnero. we had a set of 4 drinks, champagnes or red wine. i went with red wine sine champagnes are fizzy. after that we relished in the view and light, which was better than the wine in my opinoin. my fujfiilm x100s captured everyone beautifully. J also had poloroids and i have one that i plan to give to T.
+
+for dinner we went to trader joes and each got an item to cook. i chose the salmon. i love salmon. we all cooked together, and ended up eating only at 11pm. after eating we went for the hot tub till 5am. i got to share about T and the issues with her mom. the boys helped me express and voice out the concerns in my head. we took turns asking questions with a spin the botle but in a hot tub. it didn't go very far, but we tried our best. it's one of those nights where i unlocked a new experience. and is one i never thought i would get to have. and one i hope to have more in the future.
+
+slept at 5:30 a.m. on the couch.
diff --git a/posts/190625.md b/posts/190625.md
@@ -0,0 +1,21 @@
+---
+title: 'napa day 2'
+tags: 'journal'
+date: 'Jun 19, 2025'
+---
+
+after 2 hours of sleep, i woke up at 7:30 a.m. i helped cut strawberries and mango for the breakfast. we had it outside in the backyard. this house is really nice for starting a family, or a group of friends. we went to trefethen to get some wine for J's mom. we also tasted some in teh process.
+
+here are my best to worst ranking:
+
+1. Chardonnay
+1. SIN Rose
+1. OKD five
+1. cowgirl and pilot
+1. reserve cabernet Sauvignon
+1. Dragon's tooth
+1. HALO
+
+on the way back we stopped by at oxbow public market. i had the $6.43 dollar california sushi roll, most fresh and best i've every had. we also stopped by at costco for gas. i slept for most of the ride, and i do not reemember much of the journey back. we got home around 7pm
+
+the mafia ate at Yee's. we talked abou 3 things we like and dislike. A is leaving us soon. we are all shaped by each other, some parts more than others. the memories we made in SF will forever stay with us until we grow old.
diff --git a/posts/200625.md b/posts/200625.md
@@ -0,0 +1,9 @@
+---
+title: 'cha-ya and echigo'
+tags: 'journal'
+date: 'Jun 20, 2025'
+---
+
+i spent the morning finishing my contrary report. had a chat with R about OE. feeling convicted and excited about the possibility. today J was treating us to vegetarian japanese cuisine for helping her with her interviews. i ordered the bamboo shroots ramen and it was kinda sour. it also needed more protein, i wanted tofu in it at least.
+
+after dinner just the boys walked around and we saw art at the drawing room: annex.pretty art from grade 10 to 12. we stopped at jakes steaks for fries. we all felt hungry and went to echigo home cook for curry, the "fine japanese food" was truly fine.
diff --git a/posts/290525.md b/posts/290525.md
@@ -0,0 +1,17 @@
+---
+title: 'flight day'
+tags: 'journal'
+date: 'May 29, 2025'
+---
+
+my throat started to itch around the evening, and i was convinced by W to take his throat medicine. which i later only found out were steroids.
+
+i went to bed at 11:30 to get up early to pack. but i couldn't get deep sleep till 2:30. i decided to get up at 3 and packed until 5 a.m. T was with me throughout the packing. it's peaceful in the wee hours. but i had to do it as quiet as possible. so i don't disturb the people below me.
+
+i was mad at W. i slept at 530
+
+i then woke up at 830. and i had breakfast with mafia at sisteria near my apartment. i had beets salad.
+
+adrian drove me to the airport.
+
+i flew united. the food was terrible. but i did get some sleep.
diff --git a/posts/300525.md b/posts/300525.md
diff --git a/posts/310525.md b/posts/310525.md
