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bash-insulter

Randomly insults the user when typing wrong command.

Change insults as needed :)

noob@bender:~ $ sl

  Y u no speak computer???

-bash: sl: command not found
noob@bender:~ $ gti status

  This is why nobody likes you.

-bash: gti: command not found
noob@bender:~ $ sp aux

  Go outside.

-bash: sp: command not found

Compatibility

  • Bash v4 and newer
  • Zsh

Installation

# Install Method 1 - 'make install'
git clone https://github.com/ItchyBugReporter/bash-insulter.git bash-insulter
cd bash-insulter
sudo make install

# Install Method 2 - Manually (I know what I am doing!)
git clone https://github.com/ItchyBugReporter/bash-insulter.git bash-insulter
sudo cp bash-insulter/src/bash.command-not-found /etc/
sudo cp bash-insulter/src/bash.command-not-found-messages /etc/
sudo cp bash-insulter/src/profile.d/bash-insulter.sh /etc/profile.d/bash-insulter.sh

# Install Method 3 - Manually (I don't care, insult me!)
sudo wget -O /etc/bash.command-not-found https://raw.githubusercontent.com/ItchyBugReporter/bash-insulter/master/src/bash.command-not-found
sudo wget -O /etc/bash.command-not-found-messages https://raw.githubusercontent.com/ItchyBugReporter/bash-insulter/master/src/bash.command-not-found-messages
sudo wget -O /etc/profile.d/bash-insulter.sh https://raw.githubusercontent.com/ItchyBugReporter/bash-insulter/master/src/profile.d/bash-insulter.sh

Then you can enable bash-insulter one of three ways:

# Enable Method 1 - Enable globally via profile.d
Edit /etc/profile.d/bash-insulter.sh and set GLOBAL_BASH_INSULTER=1

# Enable Method 2 - Enable globally via /etc conf file
Edit your shells global config file (/etc/bashrc , /etc/zshrc , etc.) to add the following to the end:
if [ -f /etc/bash.command-not-found-messages ]; then
    . /etc/bash.command-not-found-messages
fi
if [ -f /etc/bash.command-not-found ]; then
    . /etc/bash.command-not-found
fi

# Enable Method 3 - Enable for one user
Edit your personal shell config (~/.bashrc , ~/.zshrc , ~/.profile , etc.) then add the following to the end:
if [ -f /etc/bash.command-not-found-messages ]; then
    . /etc/bash.command-not-found-messages
fi
if [ -f /etc/bash.command-not-found ]; then
    . /etc/bash.command-not-found
fi

After you enable bash-insulter, logout then login again and type some invalid commands for the effects to be visible.

Configuration

bash-insulter can be customized, or even be made polite and nice, by populating CMD_NOT_FOUND_MSGS or CMD_NOT_FOUND_MSGS_APPEND environment variables. The values should be arrays. CMD_NOT_FOUND_MSGS replaces the default messages, while CMD_NOT_FOUND_MSGS_APPEND appends more messages to the existing ones.

It is probably cleanest to source a file populating the environment variable as needed. In this example I create a file /etc/bash.command-not-found-messages with the following content:

CMD_NOT_FOUND_MSGS=(
    "You are so smart!"
    "You look pretty today!"
    "I don't know what to say"
)

Then source this file before you source the script (if you haven't done so already):

if [ -f /etc/bash.command-not-found-messages ]; then
    . /etc/bash.command-not-found-messages
fi

if [ -f /etc/bash.command-not-found ]; then
    . /etc/bash.command-not-found
fi

Then logout and in again. The end result is that you will now use your messages instead of the default ones.