Behavior of destroy on associations does not match default ActiveRecord

[mvz]

In default ActiveRecord, calling destroy on a many-to-many association always destroys both the join row and the joined record:

• Rails 5.2: https://api.rubyonrails.org/v5.2/classes/ActiveRecord/Associations/CollectionProxy.html#method-i-destroy
• Rails 6.0: https://api.rubyonrails.org/v6.0/classes/ActiveRecord/Associations/CollectionProxy.html#method-i-destroy
• Rails 6.1: https://api.rubyonrails.org/v6.1/classes/ActiveRecord/Associations/CollectionProxy.html#method-i-destroy

In all cases the documentation says:

This method will always remove record from the database ignoring the :dependent option.

ActsAsParanoid keeps the records but should soft-delete it instead.